


I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch

by bi_magic



Category: The Queen's Gambit (TV)
Genre: F/M, basically i wanted to write jealous benny and this is where we ended up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 03:08:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28611075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bi_magic/pseuds/bi_magic
Summary: the thought of townes, and what he was doing in beth's room with her that day, doesn't leave him.
Relationships: Beth Harmon/Benny Watts
Comments: 14
Kudos: 222





	I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch

**Author's Note:**

> first of all they are soulmates and you can't change my mind. i watched this show and just fell in love with them, and tried really hard to write something good for them, so yall got this. it's really just benny being very stupidly jealous of townes and then deciding to do something about it.

when benny calls and hears townes' voice on the other end of the line, he's taken aback, to say the least.

he's an analytical person, always has been, always noticing the small details and asking questions. the difference is that usually, the answers are quite easily found. this time, there's just a big mess in his head, trying to remember every single detail he knows about this man's relationship with beth. questions race through his mind, spinning around, tumbling over one another, and benny can already feel a dull headache forming somewhere behind his brow.

he puts all that aside, because there's a fucking game to be won. if beth wins, they can talk about it. if beth loses, he isn't sure there will be anyone left to talk to. he doesn't ever want to see her reach so low again. he isn't sure he wants to see her at all, anymore.

"hello?" her voice cuts through the silence, like a dandelion, like a knife, and no, no, he definitely does want to see her. he'd fly out there right now if he could. but he can't, so he tightens his grip on the phone and focuses.

"if he goes for the knight, hit him with a king-rook-pawn," he tells her straight away, no manners, no questions - he can't afford the distraction right now, and neither can she.

"benny?" there's so much vulnerability, so much hope, in the way she speaks his name, that he feels like she's split him open just by saying it. but there's no time for that right now, for the rapid beating of his heart, and so he lets himself drown in his own head for just the shortest second: he thinks of her, of all her sharp edges, of her soft hands, and he thinks of townes, there in the room with her, and he thinks of the game.

he sets everything aside and concentrates.

\------

beth wins. beth wins because of course she does, because she's the best he's ever come across. she wins and there's no one prouder of her than him, there's no one. the news are broken to him in a phone call, but they don't get to talk much then. she'll be busy these next few months, he knows, no time for his bullshit. he tries to swallow around his impatience. it tastes bitter.

the thought of townes, and what he was doing in beth's room with her that day, doesn't leave him.

benny has never really been the jealous type - but then, for all that he hates to admit it, benny has never felt about anyone the way he does about beth. the image of townes (benny only has a vague picture of him in his mind, but he knows he's a handsome man, as handsome as they get in the chess scene) putting his mouth on beth, his hands on her skin, maybe even ripping off her clothes the way benny did - it makes him sick to his stomach. he can scarcely think of anything else, cn barely even play chess, for a few good weeks. his brain runs so fast it makes him dizzy, constant images of big hands on her thighs, in her hair, tracing her bare skin, gripping her hips. someone lying with her, chest to back, heaving, and the air smelling of sweat and sex. the thoughts make him want to take a cold shower, wash them off him. it doesn't help. at a certain point he realizes nothing will.

that's when he starts his car and heads to kentucky.

\------

despite all the mental preparation benny has put himself through, when the big door of her house swings open, his breath hitches in his throat. she looks the same yet different, healther than he's ever seen her - volatile, awake, so alive it almost hurts to look at her. she smiles at him, a little grin that's innocent and teasing in equal measure, that makes him feel unstable on his feet.

beth tilts her head to the side when the silence stretches. "hi, benny."

it feels like his head is too crowded to think, so he doesn't. the first words out of his mouth are: "did you fuck townes?"

god damn it, he should have at least hugged her first, said congratulations, something, anything. why did his manners, his wits, his entire brain, suddenly jump out the window? he should have thought this through, planned out what to say - but it's too late for that now. clearly, he's a mess. she can probably see it too, just like she's always seen right though him in the past.

beth's eyes are wide, but she doesn't look offended, only surprised. he can feel her bright stare pierce through him. if she keeps looking at him like that much longer, he'll end up faling apart under the gaze. beth has power over him and he knows it, and she knows it, and benny hopes she doesn't use it against him. this isn't chess. for once in his life, this has nothing to do with chess.

they're quiet for a while, still standing at the door, the kentucky sun blazing hot above them. beth seems to be considering her next move.

"no," is all she says in the end, painfully honest in a way only she can be, somehow both predatory and innocent. benny doesn't wait for her to continue. he steps forward and pulls her in.

her mouth crashes onto his and it's a kiss that's violence. his fingers grab onto her hips so tight it'll surely leave bruises, and hers, in reponse, tighten in his hair. beth feels so good this close to him, heat radiating off her and right into him, and he's missed her so much, god, he's missed her. a wild beast in the pit of his stomach rises: he doesn't want anyone else to touch her like this ever again.

"take me to the bedroom," she murmurs, feather soft, into his mouth, and benny almost growls as he swallows her words and hoists her up against him. he doesn't need to be told twice.

\------

later, they're lying in her bed, her head on his chest, and beth is laughing at him.

"I can't believe it took you three months to talk to me just because you were jealous," she remarks, still heaving out her breaths across his collar bone, and yet she manages to sound so fucking smug he wants to turn her back and have his way with hr (again) until she can't do anything but gasp and moan. 

"I was not jealous. I was worried." he says adamantly. is she right? of course. will he ever admit it? not a chance in the world.

she snorts. "worried? townes is twice as decent as you."

he just stares down at her, brows raised, eyes wide, until he sighs theatrically. "I have never been more offended in my life."

beth laughs, really laughs, the sound echoing softly around them and benny decides - or rather remembers - that he likes the sound. then, she presses her lips to his neck and closes her eyes.

a few minutes pass, and beth mumbles, half asleep: "I like that you were jealous."

benny doesn't answer, but it's a good thing she isn't looking at him, because the cheek splitting grin on his face says it all.

**Author's Note:**

> soooooo that's it idk how pleased i am with it but i hope you guys liked it! pls leave kudos below if you did, and i'd leave to hear your thoughts in the comments <3


End file.
